What Would You Do?

I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.  I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4: 12-13

What would you do if neither time nor money were an issue?

This is a question I would answer in different ways depending on when you asked me.  In my 20s, I would have told you that I wanted to continue to study music, to get a Masters Degree, and then a Doctorate of Music.  I wanted to teach trumpet in a university and play in a symphony orchestra.  I would tour the country - or even the world - giving master classes and soaking up the local culture.

As I approached 30, I would have told you that I wanted desperately to be able to have children.  If I had been able to afford testing, I would have tried to find out why I wasn't able to do so.  I would have searched for the best doctors and tried the latest therapies.  I prayed and I waited and I continued to dream of becoming a mom.  My dream to have children was eventually fulfilled.  I have two beautiful daughters and a handsome little boy as well.

In my 30s, I would have answered in a different way, still.  If I had lots of money and time wasn't an issue, I would have tracked down every autism expert to get help for my daughter, Anna.  I would have exposed her to every promising new therapy.  I would have learned how to do all the therapies myself.  I would have made sure that she had the best medications.  I would have worked with other parents and experts to try to prevent autism and to cure or diminish it's effects in children and adults who live with it.  We did the best we could with what we had at the time, and we will continue to do everything possible to improve the lives of all three of our children.

I turned 40 this year.  Looking back over my life.  I can see that God has blessed me abundantly.  None of us has unlimited time and I certainly do not have unlimited funds.  But what I do have is plenty.    There have been dreams realized, and dreams that I had to let go of.  I can see that even through times when I felt very small and completely insecure, God had a plan for me.  He has given me many talents.  Many of these, I have used in unconventional ways.  I'm not playing in an orchestra, but I used music to help my daughter to learn everything from our street address to the states and properties of matter.  And I am helping my other children learn to sing and play instruments.  They are all musically inclined and I love to watch them as they acquire new skills and perform in concerts and plays.

The Lord has added to my own set talents as well.  God has given me an abundance of patience over these many years.  He has helped me to use my training and experience as a teacher to help my own children.  He has used my organizational skills to help me to keep track of the many therapies, doctor's appointments, rehearsals, school projects... you get the idea.  There's a lot to keep track of at our house!  He has helped me to let go of my plans and to trust that His plans are better.  This is the time to invest in those beautiful children that I prayed so many nights for.  It is my job to teach them and to lead them.  I won't let myself, or anyone else, minimize that very important job.  They need me.  And God wants me to teach my children His ways, and forever and in all ways to lead them to Him.  It isn't an easy task.  Some days it seems impossible, but I know that in His strength, all things are possible.